When a Woman Trivializes a Men’s Sexuality – The biggest complaint that men have about their wives has to do with a lack of interest in sex. For good reason. Women are often guilty of trivializing their husband’s need for more and better intimacy.
“He’s ridiculous!” she says. “There’s absolutely nothing wrong with my sex drive. I’m not frigid.” What’s wrong is … him!
“If he wants more sex, he ought to try talking to me once in a while. Showing me that he values all the other thousands of things I do for him, might also help.
Men have been socialized not to complain about the absence of sex in their marriages. Most are embarrassed… disappointed… to have to bring it up at all.
In the beginning, intimacy had come naturally and often; she was as into him too. Then, kids, jobs and life made new demands.
Today, he thinks about sex as much as he ever. He’s just too angry most of the time, to address the issue.
He still cared enough, though, to try once more. The couple went to visit with a marriage counselor.
“Why are you making such a big deal about this?” asked the wife. I’m a mother now… the mother of your children. Besides, we made love two weeks ago in Vegas “
It is an unparalleled frustration for a husband to discover that the sexual adventures he’s shared with his wife, have not been nearly as meaningful to her.
This man is not a bad guy. He’s just a guy. A guy who cares about his himself and his family.
In front of the counselor, he exploded at his wife:
“Sweetheart, I love you. I do. I love our family, our kids and our friends. But you are my life partner and my lover. I need you to want me, to want my body. I need us to have sexual fun together. If these things aren’t important for you too, our marriage is not going to survive for the long haul.”
The wife couldn’t believe her ears.
“It’s tough for your husband or most any man, to risk himself with those kinds of words. You’ve got a man who must really care about saving your love,” said the counselor.
Wives: You can learn this lesson in your current marriage… or in your next one.
Email Dr. Linda
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