I watched as the body of REP. .JOHN LEWIS was transported over the bridge in Selma last week and I thought about my mentor and friend Dr. Bill Lyon who participated on that  first Selma march for freedom so many years ago.

DR. LYON, a white man, believed, as I do, that “we are all NOT born equal…” which he saw as a fact and not as an excuse.

 “The past can be used only to explain what one must overcome… to become.”

 He was a psychologist extraordinaire, who inspired me to fill my professional toolbox.

 The pandemic aside, I asked twenty random people (from different ethnic and racial groups) to rate their personal life satisfaction:

                                                   ARE YOU SATISFIED WITH YOUR LIFE RIGHT NOW?

 All but one said “No”. Doesn’t that blow you mind? I really was careful to exclude the challenges of the Covid 19 scare, as much as I could and as much as my “subjects” were able.  Then I re-thought It.  Could this be good news? When people are unhappy enough, change becomes more likely.

It does seem that this is a time for change.

I asked the same twenty people:

WHAT CHANGES, IF ANY, DO YOU PLAN TO MAKE TO IMPROVE YOUR LIFE?

 Not one person committed to any kind of change.

Wow. Double Wow.

If Dr. Lyon were alive, my bet is that he wouldn’t have been surprised. He always taught that people prefer “numbness and illusion of constancy to uncertainty”. That  what  they seek most, is security… of all kinds.

Take a moment, right now, just for yourself … What kind of security do YOU need for yourself? 

SPOILER ALERT: Perfect security is unattainable… it is not of this world and can only be approached by living fully, enthusiastically and by taking a few chances.

My intention is not to  depress you. I know that wouldn’t be cool. Dr. Lyon would agree.

I n fact, he had a  wonderful “LAW,”, about DEPRESSION:

He said, “Don’t you tell me what I should do about my depression…. It won’t work.”

He went on to explain that depressed people, by definition, are not optimistic. He suggested that the next time you encounter a friend or a lover who is depressed, that you not try to advise, agree or disagree… and that you just listen. Likely that your friend will feel better because he/she will not feel so alone.

Therapists learn to listen without  judgment, and you can do that too. Ask your friend what they find makes them feel better. Try to remember that each person with depression faces their own journey with challenges that will be unique to them.

In the name of LOVE, help your friend get help when it is needed. Remind him/her that their health care professionals are good resources. So is The National Institute of Mental Health. Offer to help make the contact.

Thank you, JOHN LEWIS for a life time of inspiration and hope for the future. Your life will continue to inspire us to move forward into a better and fairer world.

Thank you, BILL LYON for all that you taught us. Your wise counsel lives on.


Thanks For Visiting,

Email Dr. Linda

{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }

AvatarMike DormanAugust 8, 2020 at 10:12 am

What a timely and very good article Dr. Linda. You give cause to self introspection and examination that seems especially valuable in these unusual times. Thank you

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AvatarLynn HortonAugust 8, 2020 at 10:38 am

James 1:19 My dear brothers and sisters,(A) take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak(B) and slow to become angry,

Sometimes you just want to be heard…

I have a friend who calls and I think she just wants someone to giggle with …

I didn’t know Dr Lyon marched How great is that He was such a nice man

Mr Lewis & Dr Lyon
Thank you for stepping out in faith to change our world to be a better place He has a plan for us and it is not to harm us but for “all” of us to prosper

Learn something new today folks …

Just a girl from Newport

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AvatarSheila CalderonAugust 8, 2020 at 11:36 am

Thank you Linda: Gave me some good food for thought. I like what Lynn Horton Quoted James 1:19. — I need to work on the (B) slow to become angry. As I am getting older, I find I am too quick to react in anger and must get a handle on that.

I’ll have to read about Bill Lyon — but no question that John Lewis’s life will continue to inspire us and hopefully he has touched on so many lives to give us all hope that we will be in a better place in time.

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AvatarPaulaAugust 9, 2020 at 6:08 am

Timely advice. John Lewis deserves all of our praise. Strong, sensible, magnificent role model who asked of no one what he wouldn’t do himself. His voice is missed.

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